Thursday, February 17, 2011

Milspouse Friday Fill-In #30 + MilSpouse Weekly Roundup #24

Time to take a break from cleaning so I can fill out the MFF for the week!  Check out Wifey's if you want to participate!

1.  What is your favorite MilSpouse blog (not including Wife of a Sailor who we all love, or your own)? submitted by Our Crazy Life  Tough competition!  I follow a ton of milspouse blogs, but I'm going to say my top two (it's a tie!) are Natalia's Army of Two and the eponymous Just Another Snarky Navy Wife.  I appreciate blogs that I can relate to - kindred spirits, of sorts.  Natalia is another 30something wife, no kids, who's highly educated and going into the military herself.  Snarky Navy Wife is just hilarious and drops the f-bombs like I tend to do in real life, although I'm working on it.  She poses critical arguments about current events and real military life, that many don't have the ovaries or the desire to touch.  I can respect that and relate to it, with my background in Women's Studies.

2.  What are your favorite perks about your s/o being deployed (we all know there are perks)? submitted by Ramblings of a Marine Wife  Not having to worry about cooking dinner for everyone, being able to maintain the cleanliness of the household without DH messing it up, monopolizing the TV and the bed, coming and going as I please, hanging out with my friends and going out dancing, the extra money and being able to splurge and not worry so much about finances, minimal arguments between DH and I (since he's really lovey dovey when he's away), and being able to focus on whatever I'm doing, rather than thinking about getting home as soon as possible.  Whew!  I really do thrive during a deployment, I won't lie to you.

3.  How long did you date your <significant other> before getting engaged?  Married?  submitted by Utterly Chaotic  We never really dated, I'll say that.  We had a whirlwind romance and moved in together three and a half months after we started seeing each other/fell in love.  It was a full two years before we were married, although some "friends," and I say that very loosely, would have you think it was a much shorter time.  Yes, there's a story there, but it's best left for trusted individuals.

4.  What do you think your <significant other> would do if s/he wasn’t in the military? submitted by Adventures of M-Squared  My DH is in the reserves and hasn't found permanent employment in the five months that he's been out here.  This is a battle we fight every day, as I've written about on here.  There are some days where I wish he'd do anything - legal, of course.  Luckily, he has recently upped his motivation and officially enrolled in our local community college today!  He's going back to school to get a degree in Criminal Justice while he waits to start the law enforcement academy there.  He's got a lot of experience and skills in the HVAC area, but he doesn't want to go back to that.  He's also a skilled carpenter, and has done construction before.  I just want him to be satisfied with what he does and get the same feeling of fulfillment that I do.

5.  If you could talk to the Secretary of (fill in your appropriate branch) what is one suggestion you would like to bring to their attention in order to improve the lives of military families?  submitted by My Life as His (Air Force) Wife  I would highlight the continued need for a better transition program for soldiers leaving active duty.  The experience of the individual is completely dependent on the sending unit.  DH's command rarely let him get away to take care of his business, didn't provide him with the correct information about the processes and protocol, and it's part of the reason we've been suffering.  The Air Force is rumored to have a better program, and while they accept other service members, it's difficult to get into.  I would also bring to their attention the awkwardness between those transitioning from AD to Reserve status, the lack of knowledge about transition services for Tricare, and other problems we've faced.

Catch up on your milspouse blog reading or find new ones at The Whole FamDamily!


hmb said...

We had issues when J came off active duty from the nat. guard. He was beginning to think he'd have to apply at Wal-mart. It was very discouraging and I'm with you--they need better programs for those that are ETSing from active duty or just getting back from doing fulltime things in the guard/reserves!!

Erin said...

They really do because people like my husband have been out of that game for SO long, they have unrealistic expectations about how working in a civilian world goes, including the job search process. Tasks like calling back to express interest are foreign to my husband. I would love to see DH do active reserve, and there's a chance he might do some at a recruiters if need be.

AngieDMac said...

The AF does have a great transitioning program, but it's still not easy either way. And it's difficult getting in because they are currently overmanned in a lot of fields. They cut people every year because of it. :(

JennyO said...

Ow, yes the transition from AD to NG/AR is a tough crap shoot. I deployed with an New Jersey unit, flew home by myself to California. No fan fare, no real demob. It was like POOF welcome back. Military One Source saved me with its assistance to transition.
I'm going to have to go take a gander at some of those milspouse pages. See if I can find my ovaries ;) hehe j/k

Erin said...

@Angie - That was the issue with me doing USAFR as an officer here - they're overloaded with people and some have to go out of state to find an available position.

@Jenny0 - Military One Source is awesome, gotta lov ethem! Have fun on your ovary search! :)

To the Nth said...

"I really do thrive during a deployment, I won't lie to you."

It is so refreshing to see someone come right out and state that. Popular opinion would paint all of us military wives pining away and bravely fighting back tears every minute our men are away. Sure, we miss 'em, but we don't become shadow people when our spouses are deployed, only to spring back to life in a fit of patriotism at homecoming.

Natalia said...

Goodness, thanks for the shout out! I love reading your blog too and can't wait to follow along on your new adventures!
Mr. F and I had quite the whirlwind love affair but it worked for us and when you know, you know.
Have a great weekend!

Erin said...

@TotheNth - Thanks, I really appreciate that. No one wants to see their DH in harm's way, but it works for both of us. He wants to deploy and I'm perfectly fine with it. It makes him feel useful, and like he's doing his job. I want him to have that satisfaction, and I make the most of my alone time. Life goes on, whether he's with me or not. Yes, I love him to bits and want to share experiences with him, but I'm also perfectly capable of making myself happy and keeping myself occupied.

@Natalia - I very much know what you're talking about! DH and I knew, early on.